Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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