Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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