Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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