I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
