just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
