Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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