They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I need water and some morals
Randomize
