How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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