everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize