Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
