Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I AM VODKA MAN
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
