I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
