We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
