im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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