Farmville is her only friend.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize