a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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