I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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