your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
