I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
where does the pee come out of this thing
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
