as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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