Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
