he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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