dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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