Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
