Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
