we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
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