Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize