Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
