Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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