do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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