It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
