im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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