just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
