No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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