Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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