Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
where are you?
Hypothermia
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
