You smell like a Billy Joel song
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
