You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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