Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
