similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
