38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
