I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
should my penis look like a turkey
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
