they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
