they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
