marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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