When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Drunk is a universal language darling
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
