David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
someone owes me an orgasm
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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