She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
My feet surprised me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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