well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
