Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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